eat my brains header graphic
RSS  l  Facebook  l  Twitter  l  About Us  l  Contact Us  l  Link to Us    
    Home    News    Reviews    Features    Top Ten    Zombie Club    Competitions    Links        
latest reviews Back | Next   

Rogue River

Director
Jourdan McClure

Cast
Michelle Page
Art Alexakis
Chris Coy
Michael Cudlitz
Lucinda Jenney
Bill Moseley
Michael Rooker

Rating



Runtime
80 mins

Genre
Bad Horror

Available From

Amazon UK
Amazon US

Click on the icons above to purchase this title and support Eat My Brains!


Rogue River (2012)

22nd Jan 12





Plot
After driving to Oregon’s Rogue River to scatter her father’s ashes young Mara soon finds herself held captive by married couple Jon and Lea.

Review
It's true that originality can be somewhat lacking in movies, especially genre movies, however take a well known template, jazz it up with fresh angles and the chances are you'll be forgiven for the lack of new ideas elsewhere and build up a respective fan base. Kevin Haskin, who co-wrote Rogue River's script with Ryan Finnerty, claims that they have done just that by seeking to explore with their story how people that first appear ordinary can actually be disturbed. Other's involved in the production have dribbled on about Haskin's characters having 'so much dimension and nuance to them' and that 'the story is different from the typical horror movie...a lot more intense, a lot more thought-provoking'. Sounds promising doesn't it?

They also make sure to chuck in a provocative cover - to ensure the rental fees come trickling in; but don't be fooled. The cover shows a scantily clad woman with her aesthetically pleasing frame up to her knees in water. It has nothing to do with the film at all although it is true that the lead character Mara (Michelle Page) is in a state of disarray come the finale - but not in such a titillating fashion. It's designed to get people picking it up for an evening's viewing and it will definitely do just that. Add a quote from a respectable film magazine declaring that Rogue River is 'an ordeal of agony, incest and out-and-out insanity' and who wouldn't be tempted? And if that wasn't enough to whet the appetite there's also the casting of genre favourite Bill Moseley (The Devil's Rejects, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2) in the male lead. By now you'll be grabbing up a copy of Rogue River; parting with hard-earned cash to rent or buy it and eagerly throwing it on to watch the moment you're back home and settled.

It won't take you long to realise that when the magazine quote talked about 'an ordeal of agony' that they were spot on with their description. Rogue River is an endurance test that will have you feeling as trussed up and despairing as much as the female lead. Lacklustre doesn't even begin to cover it. First time director Jourdan McClure has a decent cast at his disposal but what he lacks is any oomph in the writing department; instead he has been lumbered with a Misery wannabe for the torture porn generation that ticks off the clichés in a groan-worthy fashion from the start. Writer/Director Lucky McGee's The Woman has a woman trussed up against her will, albeit a feral woman, managing to unsettle, shock and provide surprises exactly what you want from something that could otherwise end up run-of-the-mill. Here writers Kevin Haskin and Ryan Finnerty insult their core audience by offering up nothing new at all; instead just trotting out everything as expected. Did they assume the viewers they were catering for had not seen a horror movie before?

As Mara looks to scatter her recently deceased father's ashes into Oregon's Rogue River she is unexpectedly joined by a gentleman called Jon (Bill Moseley). He advises her that it would be against the law to dispose of her father's remains in the flowing river and then offers to walk her back to her car only to find that it has been towed away by the police. Mara tries her mobile phone to sort out getting her car back and wouldn't you just know it but there's no phone signal to be had - yeah, THAT old chestnut! Anyhow Jon kindly offers Mara a ride into town but should first stop by his home and inform his wife Lea (Lucinda Jenney from The Mothman Prophecies that he will be doing so. Lea is accommodating and insists that Mara stay over and sort out her affairs in the morning. One evening meal later and Mara is soon being held against her will and it quickly transpiresthat Jon and Lea are actually brother and sister rather than a married couple and are looking for Mara to procreate and provide them a baby.

Rogue River feels tiresome and unsurprising from the opening scene. We see Mara bloodied and worse for wear pointing a handgun to the side of her? head. A shot is heard as the screen fades to black. We know that this is a scene we will see again come the film's climax and we also know that by the image of Mara about to shoot herself fading to black that she definitely hasn't done so. So far so generic! We then cut back to seeing Mara taking off for a long drive to find a suitable spot to scatter her father's ashes and stopping at a remote part of Rogue River before her life takes a turn for the worse.

Mara seems completely unmoved by the events that happen to her aside from the odd sniffle and sob. From finding her car gone, to accepting a car ride with a stranger she insipidly takes every suggestion onboard with a quiet nod. When talking about the quality of the potato being served for dinner she is told 'I hope you like it as you'll be getting toeat it all week' and never ever stops to question why a week when she's only meant to be there for one night. It takes seeing Jon in just his pants (the shock!) and finding out that Lucinda wears a wig (the shame!) along with the troubling discovery of a still breathing fella in their freezer for Mara to start whimpering; but by then it's too late! She's soon trussed up in leggings to restrict her movements and nothing else of any interest happens at all.

Cops show up at Jon and Lea's house searching for Mara and you just know nothing will come of it and that - cliché alert! - they'll be shot and killed before they leave the property. In fact nothing that occurs in Rogue River surprises at all. At just seventy seven minutes it manages to feel much much longer. The writers obviously feel they have the ingredients in place to shock their audience and feel that certain issues like kidnap, torture and incest will do enough to illicit the response they are aiming for without ever once stopping to wonder if their audience may have seem enough of this type of movie before; not to mention one done a hundred times better too. Chances are that by the time you switch the movie off you'll be crying as much as the female lead and feeling equally as tortured and tormented. Avoid!

Posted by
S Cockwell



Return to Reviews Index

comments powered by Disqus
Zodiac

28th Jul 07
When a slaying is shown on screen it is done so in a cold and exacting fashion rather than veer towards the sensationalistic.
Zodiac
29th February (2 wol 29 il)

12th Mar 07
Normally to find one cop this stupid you’d rent a Pink Panther movie, to find two just beggars belief.
29th February (2 wol 29 il)
Vacancy

9th Oct 07
A horror thriller set in a motel that isn't by Alfred Hitchcock...
Vacancy
latest news
Review - You're Next
17th Feb 14

Review - World War Z
27th Sep 13

Review - Remains
26th Sep 13

Review - From Beyond
1st Sep 13

Feature - Prometheus: Your Questions Answered
16th Jul 13

Review - Knightriders
6th Jun 13
More...
latest Zombie Clubs
You're Next

17th Feb 14
I'm next? Shit, I'm outta here.

World War Z

27th Sep 13
The most expensive zombie movie ever isn't actually that bad.

Remains

26th Sep 13
Zombies attack a casino in Reno. Whatever next?

From Beyond

1st Sep 13
So there you are mucking about stimulating the pineal gland and the next thing you know your dead colleague returns from beyond.

Knightriders
6th Jun 13
Megan is Missing
29th May 13
latest top tens
Prometheus: Your Questions Answered
16th Jul 13
Prometheus, then. That was a bit confusing, wasn’t it? Worry not – we can explain everything. Kinda.

FrightFest Glasgow 2013 - Day Two
4th Mar 13
Dumb movies are a lot easier to have fun with when they drop the rape.

FrightFest Glasgow 2013 - Day One
3rd Mar 13
Another sunny, snowy February in Glasgow and another rollercoaster of a line-up from Frightfest team

Interview with The Revenant's David Anders
22nd Jun 12
We talk to David Anders about this absolute gem of a cult classic in the making

Film4 FrightFest Glasgow 2012 - Day Two
11th Mar 12
Film4 FrightFest Glasgow 2012 - Day One
3rd Mar 12
More Features...
    Home    News    Reviews    Features    Top Ten    Zombie Club    Competitions    Links        

Reviews

You're Next
World War Z
Remains
From Beyond
Knightriders
Megan is Missing
Friday the 13th Part 2
Bait 3D
Motel Hell
Delirium Photos of Goia
Friday the 13th
Lisa and the Devil
Piranha 3DD
Black Sunday (Blu Ray)
Zombie Apocalypse
Django, Prepare a Coffin
Zombie Flesh Eaters (Blu-Ray Steelbook)
Phenomena
The Return of the Living Dead
The Devil Rides Out


Features

Prometheus: Your Questions Answered
FrightFest Glasgow 2013 - Day Two
FrightFest Glasgow 2013 - Day One
Interview with The Revenant's David Anders
Film4 FrightFest Glasgow 2012 - Day Two
Film4 FrightFest Glasgow 2012 - Day One
Going off on one about Gremlins with Anthony OD
Glasgow FrightFest - February 2011
I SPIT ON YOUR COUNCIL: THE ROUGH GUIDE TO FRIGHTFEST 2010
Talking of Torment : In Conversation With Andrew Cull


Top Ten

Top Ten Films of 2011
Top Ten Essential Takashi Miike Works
Top Ten Great Moments from Overlooked 2010 Movies
Faking Fear: Top Ten Mockumentaries
Top Ten Alternatives to The Exorcist
Top Ten Nightmarish Moments on Elm Street
Top Ten 2009 Genre Movies You Might Not Have Seen But Really Should
Top Ten Movies to watch this Halloween
Top Ten Frightfest Moments
Top Ten Defining Friday the 13th Moments


Zombie Club

Nightmare on Elm Street Part 3: Dream Warriors
Vigilante Night
Deodato Night
Peter O'Brian Night
Strike Commando Dawn
George Kenne-Day
Ninja Ninja Ninja Night
Juan Piquer Simon Night
Panther Night
Klaus Kinski Sci-Fi Night
Revenge Night
Sergio Martino Night
Monsters and Dinosaurs Night
Trollogy Night
Italian Post-Apoc Night
Late Fulci Night
Warrior Women Day
Ozploitation Night
70s Kidnap Night
Chinese Super Ninja Night


              All written material © Copyright EMB 2003-2017       

Nottingham's Mayhem FestivalYour number 1 source for bloody daily horror news
The ultimate collection of rare and vintage cult filmsEat My Brains!!!!